Java with Jim

So Much Opportunity...So Little Help

2010-08-23T22:12:00.000-07:00

The world has (sort of) paid attention to the unraveling disaster of the floods in Pakistan. I am sad to say that I've only given fleeting thought to the historic floods happening as I type in Pakistan. Many - MANY - have died. Some 15,000,000 (yes, that's 15 million) people are affected. Homes are gone. Farms are gone. Towns are gone. Regions are under water. Disease is starting to unfold. Famine is underway. This is a disaster of biblical proportions.

The scope is nearly beyond comprehension. It's larger than the Indian Ocean tsunami and most of the big earthquakes of recent years combined. Millions upon millions of dollars - billions, in fact - flooded in after most of those disasters to help people in need. Governments, including that of the U.S., sent piles of cash and other means to help the local governments rebuild their countries. Yet, with the Pakistan flood aid has been horrendously slow to show up. I recently received an email from a pretty large church denomination that touted its assistance of $10,000. The US government will be sending $60M, in addition to helicopters and other material things. In total, hundreds of millions of dollars have already been given (however, much is in the form of pledges). That's a lot of assistance. The crazy thing, however, is that this disaster is the biggest the modern world has seen. Even if Pakistan's foreign minister is correct in saying that over $800M has been donated or pledged, that breaks down to barely fifty bucks per person affected. Imagine how much that would help you if you lost your: house, clothing, food, transportation, job, town, stores, local governments, roads, infrastructure, and literally everything else. It wouldn't go very far. The billions of aid spent in our own country during our recession hasn't made huge affects on most families. The $800 million hasn't even reached $1 billion.

Think of it this way. In a very rough fashion the 15 million affected may be similar to those without jobs in the US. If you're not working (and still have a home and food on the table), fifty bucks ain't gonna get you too far ahead. But that's what the world has promised so far.

Here are a couple articles on the negligence of the world:

Who Cares About Pakistan?

Painfully Slow Progress of Aid Effort

What do you think? Why has the world been reluctant to help our neighbors in need?

Arise: My 40 Day Campaign Complete

2010-08-15T09:15:00.000-07:00

When I set out on this so-called "campaign" I really did not have a clear agenda. It was simply a specific period of time to think, dream, change, discover new purposes, maybe even plan for the future. I turned 33 a couple weeks ago - and I feel a bit old and worn around the edges. Part of this campaign was to look toward the next 33 years so that, even though life will sometimes take me by surprise, I will be ready for those surprises and can weather the bad ones.

Here are a few things I've gleaned during my 40 days:

Our jobs and careers should not be the measure of our life happiness or achievement. This has long been a problem for our society; nearly the first thing we ask someone we've just met is, "What do you do?" For a number of months I had a strange mixture of embarrassment and pride responding with, "I volunteer in the community and have been traveling for about a month and a half." Those two things neither help a career nor build solid financial footing (quite the opposite - those are expensive things to do!). I know remarkable people who've never carried a long-term full-time position, people I look up to and admire for their compassion, integrity, wisdom, and friendship (and family-ship, as the case may be). My encouragement is this: grow past the need to feel good about the job you possess or the tendency to think "you've succeeded" simply because your job reaps a big paycheck. Instead, discover those places in your life that can outlive you and invest yourself there: Families and friendships. Your community. Spend regular time in a hobby: Photography. Cooking. Films. Music. Nature. You will not regret it!
Be nice! It sounds so simple, but the truth is that many of us are only nice when we have a reason. When you are in line at the grocery store, be nice to the cashier - talk to them, ask them how they are doing, read their name tag and as you leave say, "Have a good day Joe!" Also, smile are people - you will be stunned at how much YOU will appreciate this. While it helps the person receiving the smile break down barriers to the world, you will be significantly more happy when you genuinely smile at a complete stranger. If you really want to kick it up a notch - stop and help someone out. Helping an elderly person load groceries into a car doesn't just have to be for the Boy Scouts. If you are nice to the people around you, chances are you will feel less threatened by life in general (and number 1 above will be a lot easier to carry out!).
Take a time out. Your first thought might be, "Why? I didn't do anything wrong!" That may be true, but time outs are not just for kids. When life gets rough, it's okay to step back a little and assess the situation. This is more than figuring out how to navigate the problem. It means evaluating your life's direction, your values, your integrity, and your commitment to what is important. Take time to refresh your mind, heart, and spirit.
Pursue your dreams with steadfastness, but also be willing to allow God to change your direction. This pursuance means more than fighting through unfortunate job situations or bad bosses (though most people seem to think they are better than their bosses...funny how that works), and difficult times at home. Try not to trample others just to accomplish them, and don't lose far-sighted focus when the near-sighted becomes dominant in your life.
Remain humble. Accept the fact that your opinion might be incorrect. Give others the benefit of the doubt. Don't judge others unless you first give them permission to judge you. In fact, don't judge people at all - accept them, flaws and strengths combined. Put others in front of you - your family, friends, co-workers, boss, neighbors. And, smile as you take the back of the line.

I'm sure I could write a list far longer. I have gleaned some more specific lessons for my own specific life; I'll spare you those details. These 40 days were fast. I may have to do it again sometime.

Arise Day 35 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-08-08T21:00:00.000-07:00

Courage. It takes courage to live life with all of the itchy mosquito bites that make you scratch until you bleed, headaches that should really go away after a nap, and above all the uncertainty that comes when your GPS device sends you unclear directions. Taking life by its horns is not easy. Often, we'd much rather play a game with it.

Think of the annual running of the bulls in Spain (click here for a video). Every year hundreds of people make a pilgrimage to Pamplona, Spain to merely run with a bunch of bulls down the narrow streets. Also every year, people get trampled or gored by the bulls. Some die. The analogy here is that they are simply running with life, letting life dictate what happens. And if 'what happens' means getting gored, well that's just the risk some are willing to take. It can be viewed as courageous to run with the bulls. That may be true on one level. However, I think that on a deeper level, it would be more courageous to jump onto the bull's back and yield control of it.

Life isn't a game. It's not good enough to just run alongside it and let the bumps or confusion gain control. We were created with far too much intelligence and willpower to let that be the case. We're called to courageously jump on the back of the bull, gain control, and cooperate with it so that where we go resembles the gifts and passions that God has given us.

Arise Day 31 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-08-04T22:11:00.000-07:00

This week has been epic! Early mornings. Long days. So much joy and reward. The reward come from working at the Youth Development Academy. We're still in the opening days of the month-long camp, but it's already become clear that this is a program that changes lives. To know that me sitting in the office after dusk poring over lists, scheduling tweets, making calls to wait-listed students, and printing fresh rosters can have a lifelong impact on a young person's life...well that's a feeling I wish everyone could experience.

To top off this week, I have good friends. I'll come back to that in a moment, but my thought on that statement is this: Most people wish some aspects or situations of their lives were different. I am one of them. If I wrote the screenplay of my life, I'd eliminate the pain and unpleasant events that seem to largely dictate life trajectory (something that has been swirling in my mind for some time now). Yet it occurs to me that it is often through those situations that you meet great people who make a deep impact on your life, and "old" friendships are woven so strongly together because of those situations that I think I'd never trade my life for the "perfect" screenplay in my mind. If the perfect life meant never meeting great people and great friends, then I think I'd rather live a life of constant imperfection.

(Also: check out this blog for daily updates about the Youth Development Academy.)

Arise Day 26 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-30T23:04:00.000-07:00

The lesson for today: be grateful when God surrounds you with good people and good friends. I've been immersed in recent days in all of the prep work for the Youth Development Academy, but I must admit that while it is very rewarding to know that all of this work will pay off with huge dividends in the kids' lives, it has been a joy working with some great people. From the high school intern to the program coordinator to the executive director, and all of the counsel staff I've met, these are folks are full of integrity, faith, encouragement, vision, and knowledge.

After work tonight, I thought I was going out for a birthday dinner with a couple good friends. Turns out it was a surprise gathering of a bunch of people! We went to an amazing Mexican restaurant, Ortega 120 in Redondo Beach, and my dinner was capped off with freshly baked churros with chocolate dipping sauce. With the homemade cake afterward, I am still full. It was a great night with great friends. Love them all...thanks everyone =)

(I'd post a pic of my enchiladas, but I ate them before I could take a picture.)

Arise Day 24 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-28T22:56:00.000-07:00

What a crazy but good week this has been! I continue to work with all-stars Anwar and Chad at ShareFest in preparation for the 4th annual Summer Youth Development Academy. We expect well over 150 youth from the greater South Bay to participate in a full month of learning, fun, relationship building, personal growth, and simply put - a month that can change their lives. Click here to read more about what the kids will do each day. And, if you think you could financially support it, I'm quite sure any donation would be met with a smile and overflowing cup of gratitude.

Things I am mulling over between now and Sunday:

Thinking about moving.
Thinking how such a move could affect work and service.
Thinking about friendships and relationships...their importance in my life now and in the future.
Thinking about writing more on the topic of Christian community engagement.

Have a great Thursday and Friday!!

Arise Day 21 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-25T21:47:00.000-07:00

I am three weeks into this campaign. When I set out, I didn't have clear goals. It's not that at the end of 40 days I wanted to "accomplish" something specific. Still, as I enter into week 4 one message is clear. Over the past 24 hours I have repeatedly heard the message to persevere. I heard it in a sermon, on the radio, among other places. I read into this consistent message the following things:

Pursuing God is a challenge that requires strength and persistence. Don't give up when the going gets tough, and when that going takes a long time. When kids ask, "Are we there yet?" the answer is usually, "No." But eventually, after many times asking the same question you can finally say, "Yep. We're here."
If you give up the enemy doesn't triumph. It feels like it. But the enemy gains nothing and is made no more powerful or rich when we give up. The only one who stands to lose anything is yourself. Don't lose yourself in the quest.
Good people with good ideas ALWAYS experience some form of rejection and opposition in their lives. No "dream story" is truly "dreamy." There are things every successful person would never wish on anyone. If you're in a tough spot, think of the great things you will be able to do afterward.

In short, as I enter the fourth week and the second half of this campaign I am not going to let my guard down. I am not going to be weak. I am not going to loosen up. Rather, I will continue to gain strength. I will press onward and upward. I will lift my face higher than my enemies, because my God is full of love, compassion, hope, and victory. I will.

Arise Day 19 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-23T21:49:00.000-07:00

Today was an amazing day! I spent most of it with complete strangers, folks gathered from across the country (and even a few from around the world). It was the inaugural event for the Origins Project, a pretty new network of people actively trying to experience life the way God meant it. The event is two days, but I only participated today (the free day). There were several full-day options designed to expose participants to people and organizations serving the communities of Los Angeles. The day was hosted by Charles Lee, pastor, idea guy, online media guru, and all-around great guy. Here is the description of what we did:

This learning tour is designed for those currently working with or desiring to work with their cities in community development and local care. We will be learning best practices from city leaders and organizations that have a proven track record of care. We will be visiting several locations throughout the day to see first hand the kind of work that is making lasting impact. Guest speakers will include Joel John Roberts (CEO of PATH), Chad Mayer (Executive Director of ShareFest), Michael Mata (World Vision), and YOU!.

It was I was blown away by PATH. When I lived in Pasadena I helped Friends In Deed and the Ecumenical Council of Pasadena Area Churches, which held monthly gatherings of city and organizational services to help prevent homelessness and get homeless people connected into the proper resources. PATH, however, does the same thing EVERY DAY! They have a "mall" with storefronts for things from a beauty parlor to help homeless people gain their dignity back, a court with a real judge and lawyers, health clinics, job training, and much, much more. The CEO was my kind of guy - someone who doesn't like to do things a particular way simply because "that's how it's always been done." Instead, he shakes things up with a long-term, life-transforming vision in mind. And when that vision needs to change, he actually changes it.

After PATH we heard from Chad Mayer at ShareFest. I've volunteered for their Work Day for two years now, but this summer I am helping with their annual Youth Development Academy. Over the past few weeks I have been learning about the organization's history and have been catching the vision more and more. It's rock solid and making a deep impact on the greater South Bay communities. With some 150 kids coming to the YDA for the entire month of August, I can't wait to hear the stories that emerge!

Our final guest leader for the day was Michael Mata. We had a full afternoon with him, beginning at the Fred Jordan Mission. Michael gave a crash course about learning the story of a community - what to look for, how to glean some history of the neighborhood simply by walking through it, and how you can begin to learn what the needs or issues are that you might be able to help. He also walked us around the Skid Row neighborhood, and I must say that it was very enlightening to cross several distinct cultural and economic borders in only a few blocks. Michael was one of the most knowledgeable and exciting I've met in a while. I wish that I had the opportunity to study or work with him.

So that was my day. Don't be jealous. You can do it, too! Just go out, find people serving your community, and help them. You won't regret it, you won't turn back, and you won't be the same.

Arise Day 16 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-21T11:21:00.000-07:00

I seem to be posting every other day now. I trust that's okay for my 3 faithful readers. With some encouragement I may post more often...but no promises. Here's a rundown for the last couple days:

Day 15
Today I felt needed and welcome. These are two of the most important, yet least appreciated, aspects of being human. To feel "needed" means that our contributions and gifts are noticed. It means that people offer gratitude and affirmation for your work. And it means being rewarded in some way for your work. We have a deeply rooted desire to feel needed because we are created for purpose. We are fulfilled, in part, by enacting our purpose and having the fruit of that become recognized by our colleagues and peers.

I also felt welcome. That simply means having the freedom to "be me," to be the man that God has made me without pretense or having to construct a facade. I've known people to focus on others' flaws; that doesn't help someone feel welcome. I've also known people to like someone only because of their accomplishments; that's not really welcoming the person behind the accomplishment. Recently, however, I've come to know people who welcome me for who I am, to embrace flaws in such a way as help you improve through them, and to appreciate your accomplishments while not identifying you by them. It's a gift. And it's these kind of people you should surround yourself with.

Day 16
Today was a crunch day. It was great to go through my list and cross each item off one-by-one. Being as organized and methodical as I am, I always seem to have an ambitious "to do" list on hand. It is also common for me to rarely get through the entire list. I was glad to get through all but one item on today's list. I felt accomplished =)

Arise Day 14 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-18T22:50:00.000-07:00

I missed yesterday! It was a good day - a very busy day. I worked for most of it, though I took some time off in the middle of the day to have coffee with a friend of mine. After work I visited an aunt and uncle who just moved out here. It had been a few years since I saw them, so we had a good time over dinner and drinks catching up. For the first time ever I had the opportunity to bless someone's home. We stood in the middle of their family room and prayed for their new venture here in California, that they and their guests would be blessed with Christ's joy and fellowship in their new home, and that their home would become a place marked by the love of God in Christ. Good times!

Today was another warm day here in LA. I once again moved my office outdoors and got a little sun as I plodded along in a few documents. (I should admit that I spent equal amounts of time working as I did gazing at the ocean....) Church and post-church time was amazing tonight. Our pastor began a new sermon series last week. Tonight we looked at the Sermon on the Mount, and in a nutshell unpacked what righteousness looks like for the follower of Christ. It was good. The church site is here, but the podcasts haven't been posted yet for last week or today.

I recently told a friend (I think truthfully and accurately) that I am generally in a good mood, despite unfortunate circumstances that would often cause someone to be in a bad mood. My good mood is, well, a good thing. Most of the time, anyway. Even when facing undesirable situations, it is good to hold your head up high, to gain more confidence, and to put one step in front of the other without allowing the Enemy to succeed in pushing you to the ground. That is part of this whole campaign. Victory is a choice. So is failure. For me the choice is simple.

Arise Day 12 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-16T21:50:00.000-07:00

Tonight I finally watched The Book of Eli by way of the local Redbox. It was quite good, I wholeheartedly recommend it. Tonight, however, as I think about some thoughts of day 12, I think of the movie Invictus that starred Morgan Freeman as Nelson Mandela.

It dawned on me this evening that over the last few days I mistook my generally good mood for conviction to "carpe diem" (seize the day), the phrase on the t-shirt I'm wearing right now. I do not, and will not, dismiss good moods or optimism. However, I think for me over the past couple days I enjoyed a good mood and didn't quite have the "take no excuses" attitude that helps successful people succeed. This led me to remember the poem "Invictus" that is used in the movie by the same name. Perhaps, like Mandela, parts of this poem should become my daily reminder to not merely press onward in life, but to seize every minute. If I am called to be a conquerer, then conquer I shall.

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

~William Ernest Henley

Arise Day 11 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-15T23:49:00.000-07:00

Good evening. As predicted, today was a good day! I spent several hours at ShareFest working on enrollment for the Youth Development Academy - always a good time in the office with great people. I can't wait for the YDA to start on August 2nd! Even though it's nice get get work done for ShareFest, it's also pretty sweet looking at some of the photos on the walls and hearing the stories behind them. For me, it underscores that one of the main things god has been doing in my life in recent years is creating a desire to serve local communities and people in transformative ways.

I also got a couple new neighbors today. As I was busy getting some work done at home I looked outside and saw a U-Haul pull up. Turns out to be a young couple moving into the apartment right next to me. I helped unload their stuff and get it upstairs, got to know them a little. I'll admit that I feel old now, but it will be nice having some friendly neighbors. =)

Finally, tonight we had Theology Lounge again. This is our summer form of small groups, all meeting together and digging into Scripture in a deep way. We're exploring the grand meta-narrative of God's story divided into 6 acts, like a play or opera. Tonight we talked about acts 1 and 2, the creation and fall. Honestly, this is an easy one since it doesn't involve a ton of Scripture. However, that little bit of Scripture does involve a ton of theology and controversy, so it was fun to sit back and hear people dialogue about it. I have a tendency to listen and observe in these situations and refrain from teaching or pushing my own interpretations. And since pastor Tim was leading tonight, what on earth could I have contributed?? Seriously, the man articulates profound thought in straightforward language - a gift that I appreciate a million times over having read through many theology books that present profound theology in a horrendously convoluted manner. I think you should listen to the Theology Lounge series (6 weeks total, this was week 2). Click on our church's website here.

Days like this encourage me a lot. While unpleasantness can be flung at us left and right, sometimes there is breathing room. Take advantage of it! When God puts some breathing room in your week, by all means - breathe! A few fresh breaths can last a long time.

Arise Day 10 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-14T23:57:00.000-07:00

Summer arrived. It's mid-July. I moved my office to a picnic table in Rancho Palos Verdes overlooking the ocean. Free wi-fi and an iced vanilla latte topped it off. Not a bad way to spend the afternoon.

This evening I had the opportunity to participate in a multi-church meeting to partner with Oasis USA. This consortium of sorts will be addressing the issue human traffiking right here in Torrance. Many don't realize, but traffiking happens across the country in many ways. The most common thing we relate to it is sex traffiking. That's true. However, it's also present in agriculture, domestic servants, massage businesses, and other seemingly innocent occupations. Not only is it rewarding to know we can reach out and help these people, but it is extremely encouraging to be part of a church that routinely partners with other churches.

Regarding my Campaign: The quest continues. Strength builds.

The view from my makeshift office this afternoon:

Arise Day 9 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-13T17:16:00.001-07:00

There is not much to report from Day 9. I think that's okay - not every day has to have a major or deep lesson. Sometimes we simply need to get our feet settled on the ground. (Maybe there was a lesson after all!)

I had some good conversations today...always an encouragement. I do recommend keeping in good communication with people you care about. Don't let those relationships ever go stale! Word of the day.

Day 10 will be great - the forecast is good and in the evening we're having the first Torrance / South Bay Traffik Free Community meeting with Oasis USA. Several churches have been coming together for more than two months, and after some Sunday speaking on the topic with an Oasis representative, tonight we are bringing lots of interested people together to share some ideas about how we can help eliminate human traffiking from our community.

Arise Day 8 - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-13T14:42:00.000-07:00

Day 8 was actually yesterday. It was a FULL day. Up at 5am, out the door at 7:45am, and I didn't get home until after 10pm. I was here, there, and it felt like almost everywhere! All in all, it was a good day. Progress was made in some areas (always an encouraging thing). The day's highlight was enjoying a summer feast and being able to catch up with some old friends in the evening. Good times!

But that was yesterday. And since today is today, I'll write about today later. =)

Arise Day Six - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-10T22:31:00.000-07:00

This evening I bid farewell to a good friend who will be moving overseas for grad school in Israel. While sad to see her leave, I know that this opportunity will lead her to even greater things in life. Also, it's only a temporary farewell. Hopefully I will even have an opportunity to visit!

She's also been a big supporter of my professional endeavors over the past couple years. I think it is very satisfying when a working relationship grows beyond business and becomes a friendship. It reflects high respect and trust. To be sure, it's also a little tricky to navigate at times, but it's worth the extra work!

Since this is my 40 Day Campaign, let it be a lesson (mostly to me) that my professional relationships can, and in an ideal world should, transcend the office grind. It's worth the added emotional investment!

Arise Day Five - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-10T00:13:00.000-07:00

What a day! Phew! I sit now listening to Tchaikovsky's Fifth Symphony - a masterpiece of symphonic literature. During his literary sketches for the symphony he made notes that the first movement (which is playing now) would reflect the toils of life complaints, doubts, and laments, and that it musically explores the meaning of throwing oneself into the arms of faith. Nothing like ending a good day with Tchaik 5 and some cabernet. (And yes, I am armchair conducting a little. I hope no one looks into my windows!)

So what made today good? It seems that my ferocious appetite to reclaim certain elements of life is working out well. Without going into any details, it's quite possible that my friend from North Dakota is correct, something good for me lies around a very near corner (to paraphrase her thought a bit). Today in very fast succession there was a pretty neat turn of events. We are continuing the turn on Monday morning...but even if this thing turns out to be simply another connection with folks in the same field then it's all worth it. I love networking and bringing people together, so it'll be worthwhile no matter what.

Sidenote: the North Dakotan friend is a wonderful conductor I met in China while conducting the National Opera of China and Xi'an Symphony. Now, nine years later, she's got TWO orchestras, works with world renowned performers, and (I think) is lovin' life. Praise God for that! She deserves every bit of success she gets. I love catching up with people and hearing good stories!

Arise Day Four - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-09T18:41:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was day four of this campaign. I spent part of it helping an organization called ShareFest get a few things ready for their upcoming Youth Development Academy in August. There are some great people at ShareFest, and it was rewarding simply being there and talking with them about the Academy. Later in the day I helped serve a homeless dinner and started a six week "small group" called Theology Lounge - both through my church (we do some really cool things!). I can honestly say that it was been a joy to get involved with some extraordinary organizations over that past half year or so. As I move forward in life I take with me the relationships nurtured in these places, the nuggets of wisdom learned, and even new skills that will help me in my professional positions.

Arise Day Three - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-07T22:09:00.000-07:00

Today I had a sort of Brother Lawrence kind of day. Brother Lawrence was a humble hero of the faith about 400 years ago. He would probably have faded into the unknown legions of remarkable Christians had his profound wisdom not been recorded posthumously into a small book called The Practice of the Presence of God.

A couple of his quotable lines stuck with me today:

First, he said that "we ought not to grow tired of doing little things for the love of God, who regards not the greatness of the work, but the love with which it is performed." That was a hard one for me today...perhaps it has been increasingly difficult over recent months or even years. I generally do find much enjoyment in the small things, the behind-the-scenes tasks, and in very unglorifying work that most people don't want to do. However, I can't help but feel that helping a church by cleaning a filthy parsonage was "below me." It's an arrogant thought; I am fully aware of that fact. Part of me is actually convinced that I deserve a good job, working for good people, earning a good salary - and after nearly 33 years I really look forward to that kind of job!

Second, he said "we should, once and for all, heartily put our whole trust in God and make a total surrender of ourselves, secure that He will not deceive us." One thought after kicking off my Arise 40 Day Campaign is that I may be trying to seize control myself rather than surrender everything to God. That's not really the case. I fully trust that He is still at work (hidden though that work may be at present), but that trust doesn't mean waiting for something to mysteriously transpire. God gives us the capability to staunchly and energetically pursue the goals and ideas planted in our hearts. That's what I am doing. I am trusting but not waiting. As I pursue life in earnest, I trust that God will either pave the way or alter the way. Until I run into a dead-end I will not give up. I may complain about it! But falter I will not.

Arise Day Two - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-06T21:51:00.000-07:00

You can't pick your battles. Neither do your battles pick you. Rather, you are chosen for the battles that you face.

For me...defenses for battle #1 in my 40 Day Campaign are in place. The enemy may come, but will be brought down. Victory is hopeful. The doorstep is close by. Be careful, world, be careful. You mess with me, I will mess with you.

That's so serious! In a more lighthearted manner: a lesson of life that I have acquired over time is that a challenge that lies before you is meant to teach you something. It could be a new skill. It could be a change of attitude. It could be to help you alter your course in life. Just know, when a speed bump (or mountain) is dropped on your toes, pay attention and tackle it. There's no getting around the bump, nor is it worthwhile to go over it. You have to tear it down piece by piece so that the hidden road is revealed once again.

Arise Day One - My 40 Day Campaign

2010-07-05T13:24:00.001-07:00

Being tired of having a blind trust in the unknown, I am now taking the bull of life by its horns. I will seize as much control as I can. I will not waver. I will not grow tired. I will live each day to its fullest. I will work low and hopefully high. My belief is strong. My faith is deepening. There is nothing that can deter me. There is nothing that can stand in my way. I will be successful. I will claim victory. This is neither a threat nor promise. It is a prediction of fact. I will arise.

This is Day One.

My Mazda Milestone

2010-06-29T23:36:00.000-07:00

For a while I had been keeping a close eye on my odometer. In 2001 I purchased my Mazda Protege when it had 3 miles (including 2 from my test drive). Today, after nearly nine years, it digitally rolled over to 100,000 miles! It was probably the most exciting thing to happen this week.

My trusty Mazda has not only seen many miles, but also many places. It's taken me on road trips from Wisconsin to Texas for a weekend of nearly nonstop worship at Passion's OneDay03, from Wisconsin to California when I moved, from LA to Napa Valley driving up California's Highway 1, probably half a dozen trips down to Mexico, and lots of camping trips all over the place.

The poor car has had a few unfortunate incidents along the way. The worst, and most memorable, happened during some crazy wind sheers while working at a Bible camp in northern Wisconsin when a large tree branch smashed the roof. It was a mess...the rear windshield and moon roof were both obliterated, the roof was crushed in, the front windshield was about to fall inward, the interior was completely saturated with rain, the speakers were destroyed... the list could go on. Oh, and it happened the day before my birthday! The only fun thing to come out of it was that a few of the high school kids at the camp had a staff member go into town to get me a Matchbox Car that was a...convertible.

The ol' Mazda has treated me well over the years. I hope that I can get another hundred out of it, and maybe even a few more roadtrips.

Oysters and Fighter Jets

2010-06-19T14:26:00.000-07:00

Much can be said of the indefinite weekend that is my life. Any day can be a Saturday. I'm sure most people would enjoy that! Last weekend I went to the Palos Verdes Street Festival. Apparently it's been around for over 20 years! We first found a few other Comfort Zone Camp volunteers (all of us proudly sporting our own CZC T-Shirts). Then we wandered the isles of vendors and food tents. My favorite vendor was the Hawaiian Art House, selling vintage photos dating as far back as the 1920s! I love photography, so it was a feat to leave the tent without a large photo tucked under my arm. I also had a chance to sit in an old F-5 fighter plane! That was very cool. I was by far the biggest kid in line.

After getting some turkey hot dogs and a huge bag of kettle corn, we headed to another of my favorite places, Point Vicente Interpretive Center. It's always a great place to gaze out at the ocean, watch and listen to the crashing waves, and have a nice stroll along the cliffs of Palos Verdes. Good times!

Then we went to the Redondo Beach Pier in search of raw oysters and baked crab. While we never found baked crab, we did have quite a selection of oysters. Some were easily the size of my fist. Others seemed more manageable, about the size of an egg. We settled on trying a small one that the clerk said was the sweetest one available. He cracked them open for us, separated the oyster from the shell, and put them on a plate ready to be eaten. After liberally squeezing lemon on it and putting some spicy sauce on top, it was ready! Here are a few pics.

Before

During

Chewing

After
Eating a raw oyster was certainly a first for me. I'm not sure I'll do it again, but I have to admit that, despite my face, it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be . After all, it's not like it tried to climb out of my gullet! (It did swim around my stomach for a couple minutes.)

Watts Towers

2010-06-10T17:51:00.000-07:00

Today I took the Metro train from Redondo Beach to downtown Los Angeles today to meet someone for lunch. This was a first. When I lived there, I had taken the then new Gold Line from Pasadena to downtown, but had never been on the Green or Blue Lines before. It was uneventful (probably a good thing), and actually nice to get some work done. One of the interesting parts of the ride was simply observing and listening to the people in the train with me. It was fairly empty in Redondo, but as I got into Watts, South Gate, and other fun parts of LA the train filled up a bit more. And who would have guessed that business was alive and well on the train! There were guys selling bootleg DVDs, 25 cent candy, CDs...lots of goodies. And there was even a guy looking at a magazine filled with seductive ads. It was in Spanish, but the pictures made it pretty obvious what was "for sale." Yikes.

Anyway, as we approached one stop in Watts I looked out the window and saw the Watts Towers for the first time! I wasn't anticipating that, and since I had been wanted to see them for a long time it was a pleasant surprise. I'm sure standing right underneath them they would appear much more impressive, but from the 2-3 block distance they looked smaller than I thought they would. I only know a little of their story:

An Italian immigrant built them in his spare time with spare parts that range from steep pipes and mesh to glass pieces, ceramic tiles, and even sea shells. It took him some 33 years before he decided they were complete. Perhaps someday I'll venture out of the Blue Line to get an up close perspective of the Watts Towers.

33 Goals

2010-06-08T12:55:00.000-07:00

Everyone has dreams, right? Places they'd like to see with their own eyes. Things they'd like to accomplish in their fields of work. Crazy adventures of all shapes and sizes. For me, my list of dreams includes a lot of traveling - and I give thanks to my parents for writing this expensive hobby into my DNA. There are also more ambitious things on my list that would take years to accomplish. I could easily think of enough goals to double or triple this list, but since I'm turning 33 years old this summer, here are 33 things I'd love to have under my belt in my lifetime.

Visit Peru: Climb the Inca Trail to Machu Picchu & take a boat from Iquitos up the Amazon
Visit Tanzania: Climb Mount Kilimanjaro and live on Zanzibar
Visit Morocco: Ride a camel across (part of) the Sahara Desert
Visit Ireland & Scotland: Tour the Guinness headquarters and the University of Edinburgh
Visit Israel: See the Holy Land and walk the Via Dolorosa during Passion Week
Visit Jordan: See the ancient ruins of Petra
Visit Portugal: Pure vacation in coastal cities
Visit Italy: Drive through rural areas and attend the outdoor Puccini Festival
Visit India: See the Taj Mahal, ride an elephant in the jungle
Ride the Bernina Express from Switzerland to Italy
Visit Thailand: Kayak among the islands and bays
Visit New Zealand: Tour the Lord of the Rings filming locations
Visit Maine and New England coastal towns, eat lots of lobster
Visit Seattle and the Pacific Northwest, eat lots of salmon
Visit all the Smithsonian Museums in Washington, D.C.
Attend the Opening Ceremony for an Olympics Summer Games
Earn a PhD
Lead a major non-profit organization
Learn how to fly a plane
Write a book
Become fluent in Spanish
Publish a photo in a major travel magazine
Live for six months on each continent (except Antarctica!)
Hike the Wonderland Trail
Open a coffee shop / wine bar
Spend a night in a haunted place, such as Preston Castle
Run a half marathon
Learn to play the piano again
Learn to play the guitar
Go bungee jumping
Own a house
Get a motorcycle
Get married

A Reunion of the Clarinets

2010-05-31T23:16:00.001-07:00

I am on facebook every day. I enjoy it. One of the fun things is re-connecting with old friends. I grew up down the street from a girl named Mandy. She was a real trouble-maker, always wrecking havoc on the neighborhood. Totally kidding! But we were friends, went to the same elementary and middle schools, and although we went to different high schools we both ended up as music majors at UW-Milwaukee.

As it turns out, after many years and many miles, she and her husband and little girl live just down the street from me! While we lost touch after college, the wonder of facebook has reconnected us. After some initial 'life catch up' she persuaded me rather easily to play in the El Camino College Community Band, where her husband is on the music faculty.

It had been a very long time since I played the clarinet for more than 20 minutes at a time...and usually only a few times per year at most. So, it was nice to get my rusty chops broken in once again. We sat in the middle of the section and offered our humor rather liberally to all those within earshot. By the end of the semester it felt like we had never lost so many years. And, our concert turned out pretty good last weekend! It was a great semester playing again, and spending time with a good friend. Cheers!

Paintballing!!

2010-05-23T11:34:00.000-07:00

Over the weekend I joined 13 other guys for an all-day bachelor party for my good friend Jonathan. As Greg put it, after 35 years of bachelorhood, God performed a miracle on par with the feeding of the 5,000: Jonathan found a wife. Now, I can't talk too much...I'm also single. But that didn't stop me from razzing him a good bit!

We went up to Santa Clarita, north of Los Angeles, to go paintballing. The location was awesome. The place had tons of different fields from WW II trenches to Baghdad to hay bales to "the jungle" and more. Sometimes we played capture the flag. Other games were elimination to the last man standing. Once, to kill some time, we lined up Civil War style with two lines facing each other, aimed, and shot one paintball to the other side. We even lined up once and made Jonathan run back and forth while we shot at him. Poor guy...hopefully the welts will go away before his honeymoon!

In addition to having a blast on the paintball fields, I learned reason #72 why I shouldn't re-enter the pastorate. During our last game we went commando and didn't surrender until we were each out of paintballs or we couldn't handle the pain anymore. Me and a few other guys had to get out pretty quickly after running out of ammo. It was a last, and intense, all out battle! While we were standing on the dirt road watching the rest of the game another group walked past us. They didn't realize we were playing an all-out game and starting shouting to our ref that some of our guys were cheating. When our guys stayed in the game this other group opened fire on our guys! Not cool, since they were aiming at our guys' backs. One of those guys started cussing at our guys...then our ref kicked that guy out...so his group got really mad and started a yelling and cussing war with the ref. It was crazy. The head ref had to come over and sift through the madness.

After all of the swearing subsided and the refs were able to calm people down, our group organizer (Jon's best man) went over upon request to take the fall for everything. Now, I'd expect some craziness to happen while paintballing, but here's the real kicker, and reason #72 why I don't want to re-enter the pastorate anytime soon. That other group was a CHURCH GROUP. Yep. They were from "New Life Community Church" (don't bother to google it, there are numerous churches by the same name). Our group wasn't a church group per se, but we were certainly a 'churched' group. I couldn't believe all of that cussing and madness came from a church group. Unbelievable. I am definitely glad that I'm not the group's leader or church pastor with the obligation to deal with it.

Despite the raucous end to the day, it was amazing fun. After paintballing we headed to Sycamore Cove Beach in Point Mugu State Park, north of Malibu, for a beach BBQ. What a great day!

A Good Kind of Nervous

2010-05-03T15:27:00.000-07:00

Opportunities come and go, good jobs turn sour, what once was right becomes so very unfortunate.... There are many ways to describe unforeseen turning points in life that cause people to question whether the very floor they're standing on will be there after they land from their jump. A dear friend commented that my life is kind of like a ping pong game with me being the ping pong ball. Things are uncertain...to say the least! The newest volume of my life is still being sketched. Hec, the introduction is barely completed. Nevertheless, as I press onward in my quest of life, my fears and nervousness of that which has not yet come to pass are calmed when I turn my gaze upward to God. I do so hand in hand with those dear to me. And on this amazingly beautiful Los Angeles afternoon, I hope that you find some small - or large! - dose of encouragement.

Until my path is revealed, I will fight on.

3 Course Day

2010-05-01T22:50:00.000-07:00

Today was like a gigantic meal - a really, really good one. Read on...

1. Appetizer

This morning was a blast. I got up and headed to Long Beach for a breakfast meeting of the lead volunteer team at the Long Beach Rescue Mission. So encouraging! For nearly two years I've helped in a number of capacities from serving dinner, cleaning chairs, painting rooms, teaching Bible studies, dropping off piles of food, and even spending a weekend overnight under the cover of the city sounds, I've been able to experience many different parts of this great organization. In recent months I have helped as a consultant of sorts, helping to form new volunteer areas. It was exciting this morning to meet the first official mentor for the New Life Mentor Program that has been long in the making. Over breakfast we got to know each other and our different roles at the Mission. It was really special taking a couple hours to hear stories, be encouraged, and knit our hearts even tighter as we move forward with a common passion: hope for the hurting.

2. Main Course

Right after the meeting I drove over the enormous LA/Long Beach port to San Pedro where I met up with a bunch of great people from my church, Life Covenant Church. Under the bright sun I was busy clearing dry weeds from the property of the San Pedro Science Center. It was quite the transformation, changing what once was an impenetrable nature preserve into a real learning opportunity with native plants and mulch covered walkways. Others were painting buildings, painting a mural in a classroom, and doing all kinds of projects to help this small school. I had never known this place existed - it's tucked in a quiet neighborhood in San Pedro. If I was a teacher, I'd be hanging out here with my class a few times every year. There are farm animals (including a ginormous hog!), native plants, laboratories, classrooms, vegetable gardens, and probably a bunch of stuff I didn't see. The best part - hearing the school's staff comment that what we did in only a few hours was "just amazing." Now, I don't want to toot my own horn, but it's encouraging for me and those at my church to know that we were making a difference for this place. Good times!

3. Dessert

After getting refreshed at home I watched part 7 of The Pacific, the HBO mini series about WWII in the south Pacific, with some friends. This is a remarkable series. It is also heart wrenching and I was nearly on the borderline of losing it tonight. The scenes are graphic and some are downright disgusting. Worse yet, it sickens me to my core to watch the portrayal of my fellow human beings destroy each other. I don't want to get into theological implications of justifying war (or not justifying it), but if you are watching this series I urge you to take up the writers' clear invitations (they are numerous) to consider your faith alongside the horrors of war. This wasn't a sweet dessert per se, but it sure was a heavy one!

What a good day!

Sad day for me...

2010-04-13T12:11:00.000-07:00

In November/December of 2009 I had a trip of a lifetime. Ever since seeing Jurassic Park back in the 90s I had wanted to visited the island of Kauai. For about half my life I had an image etched into my mind's eye of this amazing valley. I recently discovered that it was Kalalau Valley on Kauai, so I cashed in some airline miles, booked a few campsites around the island, and set off for heaven on earth.

I'll not go terribly in depth with my excursions on Kauai, but there is one place I visited a few times: the Kauai Coffee Company. They have an enormous plantation - so large that there are streets cutting through. When you drive through the scent of coffee beans is in the air, it's amazing. The visitor center is small, but includes 25 or more varieties of coffee to sample. For me, this was a dream come true. Seriously, I think Kauai + sun + camping + coffee is better than.... Okay, we won't go there, but visiting a coffee plantation was pretty sweet.

I spent a few bucks on coffee there, and this morning, very sadly, I report that I sipped my final cup of Kauai Coffee Company's Mundo Novo Peaberry. Sad day. I guess I'll just have to go back and get more! =)

"Oh shoot, I missed."

2010-04-11T15:22:00.000-07:00

On Saturday I went to the Torrance Farmer's Market with a good friend. We walked around for a while, just looking at all of the plump produce and drooling indecisively at all of the food booths, trying to choose something for lunch. Well, after someone spilled something on my back and I slightly embarrassed my friend by reminding a lady that her dog wasn't allowed we debated between chicken shish kebobs and pulled pork sandwiches. ( BTW, I promise that my dog comment was unintentional! I simply was trying to say to my friend that "Dogs aren't allowed." I guess I said it a little louder than I intended. Oops. A few minutes later there was an announcement over the PA that people with dogs should...well, go home. I felt a little badly about it; the lady probably was super embarrassed.)

Anyway...we finally decided on a BBQ chicken shish-kebobs and veggie noodles (lo mein?). We walked over to a bench by Wilson Park to sit and enjoy our lunch. While sitting there I had my feet stretched out in front of me. An older man came walking down the sidewalk holding a thin metal pole, maybe 3 feet in length. He walked so close to the bench that I had to bring my feet. As I did that - here's the funny part of the story - he jabbed his pole at my feet and said, "Oh shoot, I missed." Then he kept walking. My friend and I looked at each other and burst out laughing. What the hec was that all about?! "Oh shoot, I missed!" Was he trying to stab my feet? LOL. Very random experience to say the least.

The rest of the day was fun - we kept joking about that old guy as we bummed around the area, going to Target, watching for whales, fixed some plumbing issues in her home, and eventually had dinner. All-in-all a great day. "Oh shoot, I missed." I won't soon forget this.

My First Blog Entry

2010-04-03T01:35:00.000-07:00

Several of my friends have recently started blogs. Some are chronicling their adventures around Los Angeles. Some are snapshots of daily life. Some are profound think tanks of life and theology. I'm not sure what mine will be yet. But I know that tonight is the night to start it. Here's why:

It is the night of Good Friday, the day we commemorate the crucifixion of Jesus Christ. Today was, indeed, a good day for me. I spent most of it helping a couple friends move into their new home - I felt accomplished after getting home (and a little worn out, too). As I walked around the block, I came across a Coptic Orthodox Church that I had seen many times before. However, this time it was Good Friday and I was on foot. Approaching the ancient-looking building I began to hear the distinct chants that one easily associates with the middle east. The stained glass windows were illuminated from the inside, where worshipers had just gathered for an all-night service called the "Apocalypse Eve & Bright Saturday Liturgy." It was just after 11pm.

I climbed the staircase to the front entrance, and the doors were all open with the sounds of worship inviting me closer. This was a foreign experience for me. In my backyard I was removed far from the normal routine of my own worship. I stood just outside the doorway, watching, listening, observing. As each person entered they signed the "Father, Son, and Holy Spirit" on their chest. Some even knelt down and gently touched the floor. One woman lightly brushed her fingers on an icon in the very back of the sanctuary.

One man encouraged me to enter and find a place to sit. The pews were largely vacant, it was easy to slide into the last one and remain unnoticed. I understood little of the hymns and chants, save for the rolling patterns, and call and response between the leaders and the congregants. Men took their places in seats located on the slightly elevated platform, not all at once, nor did they all remain their. There was a flexibility in moving around, a relaxed atmosphere. The worship was serious, yet people were at ease.

The two lead priests wore long robes and had grayish black beards. Another leader wore street clothes, but held the golden cross high as he led a processional around the entire church. I joined everyone in standing during this part. As my eyes traveled around the room I noticed beautiful paintings and artwork along the walls. The alter area had a partition adorned with an exquisite painting of the Last Supper flanked by paintings of each of the twelve disciples. On the other side of the partition you could see a painting that stretched higher than I could even see, though I could tell that a large picture of Jesus was watching over the interior of the alter. That space was very holy. Shoes were removed. Few were allowed there. The priests would back out so as not to turn their back on the holiness of the place.

I sat and listened. I read prayers and liturgy from the pew book. I observed. I prayed and worshiped and thanked God for the sacrifice on Golgotha being remembered in all that was unfolding before my eyes. This worship experience will continue until 6am. I left a little past 1am. My reflection of Christ's willingness to offer his life for ours never is complete. And my first experience in the Coptic Orthodox Church will remain with me for some time. And perhaps that is most what I noticed. The worship I witnessed took time. The phrases, melodies, the prayers...all were repeated over and over again, inviting the worshiper to truly enter a state of contemplation and pure worship of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.